Taff Down Under 6

Well not to put too fine a point on it, the week didn’t start well. Bethany came home from her Dad’s with a worried expression. Not half as worried as the look on LeeAnne’s face. Bethany’s dad had noticed that she had gained a few friends.

As in nits.

Yukky, but inevitable in school. Now I have had nits many times, [stop laughing at the back!] while working at Kilworthy, the school for buggered up kids in Devon. It therefore was no big deal for me. LeeAnne however, had not had contact with them before, and was horrified to say the least. She had some nit shampoo, and insisted we used it then, right then, now, like an hour ago. Great stuff, gives your hair a nice shine, and makes it stink like a petrol refinery. Bethany got three treatments and us two.

We also had to inform the school, who put out a discrete “Nit Alert” every time this happens.

The next day LeeAnne was sick as a dog, allergic reaction to the nit shampoo. Had to take a few days off work, poor sod was buggered. [Not literally!]

I went to an employment agency to be interviewed on Tuesday, not for a job, just so I could go on their books. I was met by the receptionist who told me to be seated and Bal [pronounced Baal…ominous!] would be out to see me. Bal turned out to be a very sweet looking, slim, doe-eyed Indian girl; she approached me and said; “Hello Mr. Thomas.”

In pure Brummy.

During the interview she was harder to understand than the bloody Ozzies hereabouts, and spent the whole time telling me how much she wanted to be back in Birmingham. Weird cow..

 

This Thurs I went to have a look around a hospital as they had an OT post going there. Bloody hell, the place was huge

 

Brian Hennessy Rehabilitation Centre provides supported accommodation for up to 20 people with varying mental health needs as well as rehabilitation, extended care, respite care and subacute facilities for residents.

The Secure Extended Care unit on the grounds of Brian Hennessy Rehabilitation Centre will provide an appropriate secure indoor and outdoor facility with 10 beds so that consumers can be catered for in small groups according to their particular needs. Consumers will be able to circulate freely within the area with unobtrusive environmental boundaries but with appropriate safety provisions.

It had its own gym, and cooking unit, an art room, several private consultation rooms. The patient’s bedrooms I would have paid good money at a hotel for. The staffing level was 1:3 and they had a list of activities as long as your arm. They also had a separate bungalow for OT rehab.

I’ll apply for that job then!

Took the mother-in law to see and exhibition on the original plans for Canberra, they were wonderful, and all done in watercolours. Canberra would have been an even more wonderful place to be if they had been followed. But the bureaucrats got their hands on them. “The elephant is a mouse designed by a committee.”

www.naa.gov.au/exhibitions/griffins/griffins.html

 

After we went to the national Art gallery for coffee, Mary’s a member so we get to use the posh bits. There was a fantastic exhibition of photography on by Rosemary Laing.

On the way home I noticed a wag had been at the road signs.

Cook Now read; Cock

And

Yass

Goulburn

Now read;

ass

burn

Oh my aching sides!

 

This weekend we drove down to the coast, as we wanted a break from the city. Mary leant us her car, a 1.8 litre Hyundai Elantra. I love driving on Ozzie roads, they’re so fucking wide, and there’s no bugger on them. I managed to get 160 kph out of it before LeeAnne hit me.

We stayed at a nice little place called Batehaven. Being a deaf twat, I thought we were staying at Beethoven, as in the composer geezer. We were booked into the Sandy Feet Lodge, and good it was too.

We spent Saturday walking on the beach, looking at the pelicans, and collecting “treasure” with Bethany. [Treasure = shells, seaweed, shite]

On Saturday night we went out and found a Mexican restaurant, this advertised “vegetarian options.” Well there was one. Just the one. It was shite.

I can wholeheartedly say, if you are ever in Batemans Bay, do not eat at “Mexican Munchies” it’s fucking crap.

Bethany, not being used to sleeping in a strange bunk bed woke up at 6.00 am the next day, and not wanting us to waste the day went around banging doors and having a wobbly in general.

Thanks Hatch.

We visited Birdland, another one of these fantastic conservation places. There we wandered in with deer, roos, and many many wild creatures. Bethany got bit by an ostrich. LeeAnne got to hold a diamond back python; I couldn’t get “that look” off her face all day. Made me feel very inadequate.

We drove up the coast to visit some heritage villages. They were lovely, if a little “hippy / twee” for my tastes, bit like Totnes for those of you that know it.

It hit 27 degrees in Tilba while we were there. Fucking miserable Ozzie winter we’re having?

Home made bread of the week; Tomato relish and satay sauce, with jalapenos.

Home made bread disaster of the week; Pesto and cheddar. [Hint; if you add too much cheddar, the bread turns to chewy sludge]

I rebuilt the bird table in the garden the other day, we’re only putting sparrow feed on it now, and it seems to be holding up. Visitors to the garden now include a pair of wattlebirds.

 

Last night in bed, what I thought was thunder, or Bethany farting, LeeAnne informed me was actually a possum running around on the roof. I believe her.

Nuff from me for now. Thanks to those of you who write back, you know who you are.

Some words of wisdom on the Welsh:

“the Welsh are stubborn-very, very stubborn. The Welsh themselves would probably rather say “tenacious”, but to anyone on the receiving end a better description might well be – bloody minded.”

“Once a Welshman gets an idea-any idea- in his mind, nothing will dislodge it, and he will go to incredible lengths to realise it. In Wales even pacifists are belligerent about their beliefs”

“The Welsh Attitude to the English can be accurately summed up as 10% resentment and 90% pity.”

“To a Welshman the benefits of the wonderful gifts of Welshness are so obvious that there is no need to boast about them. After all the Welshman’s world is made up of only two types of people: fellow Welshmen (who understand already) and the rest (whose opinions do not count)”

“Wales is run by a secret and sophisticated elite, the extent of whose power is carefully hidden. Wales is, in fact, run entirely by Women. Welsh Women are truly formidable. They are strong- minded and articulate, with clear objectives and absolutely no qualms about enforcing them.”

“The Welsh have a great military reputation as men who enjoy fighting and are good at it. This is probably because they find fierce and bloody warfare a pleasant and tranquil alternative to dealing with their womenfolk.”

“The Welsh enjoy talking. They talk incessantly. They talk passionately. They talk about anything. Two aspects of Welsh conversation can confuse outsiders. The first is their habit of mocking what they hold most dear. The second is the way they argue most violently with those closest to them, because they know what they can get away with. A casual listener, hearing the raised voices and the name calling of the most personal and insulting variety, might have difficulty in telling a normal discussion between two close friends from the start of a blood feud.”

“Welshness is an attitude of mind-sometimes psychopathic, often generous, usually friendly and always passionate”